That was the Oscars 2010 - RedHead's Fashion Awards

As I crawl out of the wreckage left by the cataclysmic, world-ending news that Avatar didn't win Best Picture or Best Director (which I think's a tad harsh), I can reflect on the outfits this year. 
By and large, not a very inspiring collection, but as a result very few big fails. 
So, to the Threesaparty Scoresheet to see whether your fashion hates and loves match mine....
The Bjork Award for Utterly Mad Getup goes to......Zoe Saldana
C'mon, it's MAD! Doesn't mean I don't love it.
The Madonna Award for mutton dressed as lamb goes to...I DON'T KNOW! Currently no horrendous photos of scary old ladies in minidresses have appeared. If I don't have a better array of photos by the end of the day it's going to be a tie between Mariah and James Cameron's latest missus.
The Jane Austen Award for lamb dressed as mutton goes to...it's a two way tie between Gabourey Sidibe....
I feel a bit mean giving this to her, because there's only so many things you can wear when you...anyway. But it's still pretty matronly.
And Miley Cyrus.....
I gave it jointly to Miley because she looks like she should have added a veil and gone to marry some nice country gent. C'mon Miley, you are not old enough to drink legally, you of all people should wear something short and loud. Like Danny Devito.
The Mrs Robinson Award for hottest older woman goes to...Sigourney Weaver
Sorry Helen, maybe next year.
The Megan Fox Award for sluttiest dress goes to...Mariah Carey
Need I say more? It's basically only a dress because of that brooch. 
The Lagerfelt for Best Dressed Man....is a tough one. It's going to be a tie between.....Colin Firth...
For impeccable yet not try-hard grooming....and Jeff Bridges, for being Zeus in a suit.
Now if they could only share the Oscar....
Oh, and the lovely Burberry press office sent me some photos, so here are some dapper gents in Burberry.
Guy Pearce, who is Highly Commended for Best Dressed Man.
And Robin Thicke, who I gather from Wikipedia wrote a song for the Precious soundtrack, is wearing what appears to be velvet. Oh yes. A la Ioan Gruffud. Hero.
The Best 'Team' ensemble goes to...the Avatar team, for subtle hints of blue. 
 Nice scarf, James Horner.
The 'Didn't Read the Invite' award for poorest attempt at black tie goes to...John Travolta. 
I mean c'mon!
The Hugh Hefner Award for best posse/pimp pose goes to...Morgan Freeman. 
What a hero. 
The Total Failure to Deliver Award goes to...Katherine Bigelow.
Yes, it's a nice, inoffensive dress that shows of a figure that I'm almost sick with jealousy over. (Oh God, she'd 58. I'm jealous of the figure of a woman older than my mum.) I might just cry. But for the first woman to win Best Director, and as an outfit that, upon receiving said accolade, is supposed to be a simultaneous 'look what you're missing' and 'ha ha ha suck it' to your ex-husband, this dress sucks.
And the RedHeadFashionista for Ultimate Fashion Win? Oh crikey, it's a tough one. Ok, we're going to do it in heats. 4th Place goes to....
Cute little Anna Kendrick. It was the first dress we saw on the night, and it was a good note to start on. 
In 3rd place is...
Maggie Gyllenhaal in Dries van Noten, for bravely avoiding a big princess gown or anything satin. 
In 2nd place is.....SJP. 
For wearing couture Chanel and looking so damn awesome, she kind of deserved the top spot. But she's been pipped to the post by.....
*drum-roll please*......
Vera Farmiga.
Just look at it. It's amazing. 

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